Gay men and straight women

Greenstone hesitated. Greenstone and Hoff both got their roles, and quickly became inseparable. A minute later came another message, one that would change everything. Housed with the rest of the cast at a resort, they would stay up until 4 a. When the show wrapped, their friendship continued and grew deeper.

Two years later, Greenstone visited an energy healer, who asked if she was seeing anyone. While he was in the lobby waiting, he was startled — and amused — when a sudden cackle pierced the theater walls. Their partnership, they say, is a testament to how love and commitment can flourish beyond traditional labels.

Straight women are attracted to men and so fiction that puts two men together especially appeals to them. It’s not quite as objectifying as the way straight men are with lesbians, but I think it follows that same thought pattern. Hoff says he understands why people are curious about his sexuality.

Samantha Greenstone and Jacob Hoff have what they describe as a mixed-orientation marriage. But they say intimacy is not the central focus of their relationship, which is monogamous. They both had concerns. She remembers feeling a jolt of recognition.

That deep emotional bond, built on mutual respect and admiration, shapes every aspect of their lives. And yet, somehow, it does. To broaden awareness of unconventional marriages, they chronicle their lives on social media, and have amassed 5 million followers in the process.

In many ways, gay men and straight women are a perfect pairing. Hoff was the special person in her life, but there was one big obstacle: his sexuality. She is straight, and he is gay. As a gay man and a straight woman, they had no road map for what their relationship might become.

Unbeknown to each other, both were starting to wrestle with a confusing pull. What does true love feel like? For the most part, relationships between gay men and straight women are healthy and positive, with one exception I'll get to later. Gay men are well-served by seeking out other gay men to befriend, both as a means of support and community building.

Gay men, especially ones that are younger, not yet out, or living in a place that doesn't have a large gay population, might feel more comfortable confiding in and being around straight women. Women as friends bring an integral sensitivity and softness to life, but men need other men.

Although research has made progress in elucidating the benefits exchanged within same- and opposite-sex friendships formed between heterosexual men and women, it is less clear why straight women and gay men form close relationships with one another. When Greenstone left the auditorium with the other hopefuls, Hoff instantly knew the petite blonde with the "big energy" was the person with the infectious laugh.

Hoff enjoys recounting how he heard Greenstone before he ever saw her. Greenstone, 38, and Hoff, 31, will mark their first wedding anniversary in November. With one exception: his wife, Greenstone. But Hoff clarifies that he identifies solely as gay, not bisexual.